Radio XVIII, side A, track 1: “Keep Your Hands To Yourself” by The Georgia Satellites

Oh, The Georgia Satellites, I was super excited when I was able to capture this particular gem on cassette.  Not just because it’s one of the best songs ever, that’s just common sense, but because this is one of the songs that they’d always play whenever we went to the roller rink in Pipestone.  You see, The Georgia Satellites, at the end of every school year up until 6th grade, our whole school got to go to the roller rink in Pipestone.  You have to understand that by “whole school” I’m talking about 100 kids, tops.  It was one of my first opportunities to have an excuse to hold hands with a girl, not because they necessarily wanted to, The Georgia Satellites, but because they were afraid of falling and being crushed by the oncoming crush of kindergartners.

The only time I’d ever heard this song was once a year, at the roller rink (along with “Big Time” by Peter Gabriel and, of course, “The Hokey Pokey”), so I had kind of assumed that maybe you guys were just like some roller rink house band.  So it was with great excitement when I heard this song coming from the speakers in my very own bedroom.

That roller rink went through a lot of changes, The Georgia Satellites.  At some point it became a heavy metal club where I’m pretty sure Great White performed at at one point, to everyone’s delight and consternation, and as far as I know, it’s now a farm implement store and/or abandoned.  I don’t get through Pipestone too much these days, The Georgia Satellites, but whenever I do happen to pass the site of the old roller rink, I think you can guess which song is playing in my head.

“Keep Your Hands To Yourself”

I got a little change in my pocket goin’ ching-a-ling-a-ling, wanna call you on the telephone, baby
A-give you a ring

But each time we talk
I get the same old thing
Always “No huggee, no kissee until I get a weddin’ ring”

My honey, my baby
Don’t put my love upon no shelf
She said, “Don’t hand me no lines and keep yo hands to yoself”

Ooo baby, baby, baby, why you wanna treat me this way?  You know I’m still your loverboy
I still feel the same way

That’s when she told me a story
‘Bout free milk and a cow and said, “No huggee, no kissee until I get a
Weddin’ vow”

My honey, my baby
Don’t put my love upon no shelf
She said, “Don’t hand me no lines and keep yo hands to yoself”

<awesome The Georgia Satellites jam>

Over here

See, I wanted her real bad
And I was about t’give in
That’s when she started talkin’ ’bout true love, started talking ’bout sin, I said
“Honey, I’ll live with ya for the rest of my life”
She said, “No huggee, no kissee until ya make me a wife”

My honey, my baby
Don’t put my love on no shelf
She said, “Don’t hand me no lines and keep yo hands to yoself”

<awesome The Georgia Satellites jam>