Radio XXV, side B, track 12: “Life In The Fast Lane” by Eagles

Oh, Eagles, this wasn’t the first song I’d heard by you.  It was the second.  The first one I ever heard by you was “Hotel California”, which used to come on radio at the same time every night as I was falling asleep, a few months before KISD FM became the KISD FM I came to know and love.  This was back in the day when I would fall asleep listening to the radio and COULD fall asleep listening to the radio.  Those days are long gone, though.  I need a fan or some white noise and that’s about it, otherwise I’ll be up for hours.

But I didn’t want to talk about my sleeping habits, Eagles.  I wanted to talk about your music.  And like I said, my first foray into Eagles territory was “Hotel California”, which I would listen to every night when it would come on with the covers up tight, because that song scared the hell out of me, and yet I couldn’t not listen to it.  I’m not your biggest fan, Eagles, I’ll admit, but I respect your position of influence in the rock pantheon.  And I very much respect that you guys are excellent storytellers.  “Hotel California” is clearly my favorite, although that one’s more of a campfire tale meant to scare the kiddies.  This one is more of a morality tale, and like “Hotel California”, it’s rich in imagery.

With a lot of songs, you could exchange the lyrics with random gobbledygook and it would still be a great song.  But with your songs, the lyrics really do matter.  And as a kid I was especially fascinated by a song about two people who were good in bed.  I knew that was something naughty, but had no idea what being good in bed actually entailed.  And I was equally fascinated that two people could have such a thing in common.  This song was pretty much completely outside my realm of comprehension, but I knew it involved sex and you also said “goddamn” in it.  That’s all you really need for a great song, Eagles, so congrats on that.  And thanks for the many sleepless nights as I pondered the beasts in that hotel and tried to imagine what that cruel dude and that terminally pretty girl were doing with each other. . .

“Life In The Fast Lane”

<awesome Eagles jam>

He was a hard-headed man
He was brutally handsome

And she was terminally pretty

She held him up
And he held her for ransom in the heeeeeart of the cold, cold city

He had a nasty reputation as a cruel dude

They said he was ruthless
They said he was crude
They had one thing in common
They were good in bed
She’d say
“Baby, faster
The lights are turnin’ red”

(Life in the fast lane)
Surely make ya lose your mind
(Life in the fast lane)
Mmm

Are ya with me so far

Eager for action

Hot for the game

The coming attraction

The drop of a name

They knew all the right people
They took all the right pills
They threw outrageous parties
They paid heavily bills
There were
Lines on the mirror

Lines on her face
She pretended not ta notice
She was caught up in the race

Out every evenin’

Until it was light
He was too tired to make it, she was
Too tired ta fight about it

(Life in the fast lane)
Surely make ya lose your mind
(Life in the fast lane)
Ahh

(Life in the fast lane)
Everything
All the time
(Life in the fast lane)
Ah ha

<awesome Eagles jam>

Blowin’ and burnin’

Blinded by thirst

They
Didn’t see the stop sign, took a turn for the worst
She said
“Listen, baby
You can hear the engine ring
We’ve been up and down this highway, haven’t seen a goddamn thing”
He said
“Call the doctor
I think I’m gonna crash”
“The doctor say he’s comin’, but you gotta pay him in cash.”
They went rushin’ down that freeway
Messed around and got lost

They didn’t care they were just dyin’ to get off and it was
(Life in the fast lane)
Surely make ya lose your mind
(Life in the fast lane)
Ah huh

(Life in the fast lane)
Everything
All the time
(Life in the fast lane)
Ah ha

(Life in the fast lane)

(Life in the fast lane)

<awesome Eagles jam>