Daily Archives: August 18, 2014

Radio XL, side A, track 2: “Heaven” by Warrant

Warrant - HeavenOh, Warrant, what the hell did kids do before hard rock ballads?  Sure there were slow songs long before bands like you and Cinderella and Poison came on the scene, but can any sub-genre of music truly capture what it feels like to be a teenager in lust than a song like this?  It’s slow, yes, but it’s by a band not known for their sensitive side, which already gives it an undercurrent of sexuality, and it starts out sweet and gentle and then after the guitar solo it just builds and builds and builds and then BURSTS and then a quick cool down and sleep.  If that doesn’t sum up almost every teenage boy’s experience in the back seat of a car since back seats were invented, I don’t know what does.

When you’re a teenage boy full of hormones and lust and are literally thinking about sex pretty much every waking moment, even if you don’t really understand what sex is, when just sitting still in geography class is all it takes to make you hard as a rock for no apparent reason, listening to a song like this telling you heaven isn’t too far away (heaven being defined for our purposes as naked with a girl) gave us more hope than even the most uplifting church sermon.  Thanks for helping us through the hard times, Warrant, if you know what I’m saying. . .

“Heaven”

 Got a picture of ya house

And ya standin’ by the door

S’black and white and faded
It’s lookin’ pretty wooorn
See the factory that I worked
Silhouetted in the back

The memories are gray but man, they’re really comin’ back

I don’t need to be the king of the woooorld

As long as I’m the hero of this little giiiiiirl

Heaven isn’t too far awaaaaaay

Closer to it every daaaaaaaay

No matter whatcha friends might saaaaay

How I love the way you move
And the sparkle in ya eyes
There’s a color deep inside them like

Blue suburban skies

When I come home late at night

And you’re in bed asleeeeeep
I wrap my arms arounjoo
So I can feel ya breathe

I don’t need to be a suuupermaaaan

As long as you will always be my biggest faaaaaaaan

Heaven isn’t too far awaaaaaay

Closer to it every daaaaaaaay (ah ahhhh)

No matter whatcha friends might saaaaay
We’ll find our waaay
Woah yeeeeah, babe

<awesome Warrant jam>

Now the lights are goin’ out

Along the boulevard

Memories come rushin’ back and it makes it pretty hard

I’ve got nowhere left ta gooo
No one really caaaares
I don’t know what ta do

But I’m never givin’ up
On yoooooou
(Heaven isn’t too far away)

Closer to it every daaaaay (ah ahhhh)
No matter whatcha friends say
I know we gonna find a waaaaay
(Heaven)
Whoa whoooooooooooooah

(Heaven)
Whoa whoooooooooooooah

(Heaven)
It’s not too faaaar awaaaaaaay
Oh ho oh oh
Whoooah whooooooooooooaaaaahh

Yeeeeeeeeeeeeaaahhhhh

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